The Customer Is Mostly Always Right

I have worked for the same company for a long time. Normally it would seem to be mind numbing, but I have gone from software technician thorough development engineer, to technical support engineer and now I am what they call a product support engineer. That means I get the problems that no one else wants. My company does industrial automation, so I get called when a factory goes down or an oil refinery stops, or a city’s water supply slows to a trickle. I have to get them running one way or another and, with the help of many very smart people, I do. I love working with people; they are a source of wonder. They are usually very cooperative, and grateful but they are also sometimes not at their best.
When I was in tech support I dealt with engineers from all over the world. They are very intelligent but sometimes, perhaps due to stressful conditions they can lose sight of reality.
As an example one February I got a phone call from the Northwest Territory in Canada. It was an engineer working in a gold mine. Now, maybe it was the cold, or the long dark nights but he had a strange question.
I will call him Jacques, (because I am not sure of his name but he was a French-Canadian.). Here is how the conversation went.
Jacques: “Hello Mike, we have been having a problem with one of our control sheds out on the tundra. It is about a half mile away from where we are and the machinery keeps shutting down.”
Me: “It just shuts down? For no reason?”
Jacques: ”Oh no. It shuts down because of the cold. It gets to minus fifty, minus-seventy out there.”
Me: ”Well our stuff is not specified to that temperature, It will shut down much before it gets that cold. Isn’t the shed heated?”
Jacques: “I know that, and there is heat out there. But the shed door keeps opening and the heater can'’ keep up then. That is what I am calling about. Can you guys figure out a system of control that will detect when the door is open so we can send someone out there to close it? Or better yet get a motor to close the door when it happens?”
Me: “Welllll we could, but it would be very expensive. Why does the door open?”
Jacques: “The caribou nibble the wire that is holding the door closed.”
Me: (after a long incredulous pause.) “Have you tried a padlock?”
Jacques (After an even longer embarrassing pause) “Errr, Nevermind”